Romantic love was invented to manipulate women. -Holzer
Something that I've been thinking about (or being forced to think about considering the 14th of February is coming up), is that I'm at the age where all my friends are pairing up. And not just pairing up to date people, but pairing up with their future husbands/wives.
.
.
.
.
Sorry, I started laughing at the ridiculous of that last statement. Not ridiculous because I don't believe in these relationships, but ridiculous considering how far away I am from this scenario. facepalm?
But back to what I was saying. everyone's pairing up. In a few years, these pairs will be shackled together via marriage. But unlike these couples, I will probably be still be single. Let's say, I'm 29 and surrounded by married people. Who's left? Who of the male populace will not be taken? Oh, oh, I know. It's the people who were deemed unworthy of being paired up when they were 25. That's right. It's the socially ill-adjusted, the social outcasts, the guys with major character flaws and baggage. Perfectly single and totally available. Awesome.
So this is what they mean when they say that all the good ones are taken.
Sorry for the pessimistic outlook, but again, the 14th is bringing the best out of me;)
MIRTH:
Blogging the delicious, the inane, the delightful, and the laughs of a twenty-something.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Saab and Samothrace
One of my favorite designers is Elie Saab and the Spring 2010 collection did not disappoint! I'm not claiming to be any sort of fashion fashionista; this is just an excuse to post up pictures I like:
I looove those sleeves ^^
And now, what I like to call the Samothrace part of the collection:
I always think about how draping in greco-roman sculpture (or any for that matter)is always used to conceal or reveal. tee hee.photo credit: http://www.coutorture.com/
Thursday, January 28, 2010
universal Nature
To grasp the meaning of the world of today we use a language created to express the world of yesterday. The life of the past seems to us nearer our true natures, but only for the reason that it is nearer our language.
This is just a follow up to the last post. It's just something I keep thinking about (I do have to think about it to teach on it). Now, my disclaimer: this is going to get a bit, uh, wordy and technical, so if your brain hurts, or if you can't take/handle discussions on human development/evolution just turn back now.
It goes something like this:
At some time circa 100,000 ya (years ago), homo sapiens emerge among other human groups (think homo erectus, neaderthals).
Around 30,000 ya, homo sapiens sapiens emerge as the only human group.
What happened from 100,000 ya-30,000 ya that allowed for the modern human to become the only species of man in the world?
There are a lot of theories, and I won't go into much detail, but the first is this: that homo sapiens were the best at adapting to their surroundings; the other groups were simply weeded out through natural selection. In this process of natural selection, the best character traits have been passed down, and as a single human race, we are the second largest group of mammals on the planet that is genetically similar (after the cheetahs). Over the course of this time, we developed aspects of human culture that is inherent to all people--a universal human nature. We generally see this as a good thing, as in the modern world, in the face of racism, hate crimes, and cultural insensitivity, we like to see just how similar we are to one another. We all laugh in the same language afterall.
but then, here's where the other shoe drops. what if the reason why homo sapiens survived over all the other groups wasn't that we were better at adapting, and had the best characteristics for survival, but that we were the group that was the one that was able and willing to commit egregious acts of violence against the other human groups. that we survived because we killed off everyone else. and if we accept that humans have an underlying universal nature-- aspects inherent to all men and women-- then what does this mean for modern peoples? that underneath all modern conceptions of culture, we have an inherent trait to commit violence on a massive scale.
and it is not difficult to see how this could be true, given the events of the last 100 years of human history. It is so easy to stand and label "good guy/bad guy;" "us/them;" "right/wrong," when we feel a moral superiority. But what does it mean when you figure out that you are the bad guy? that for all our morality, religion, spirituality... we are all bad guys.
This is just a follow up to the last post. It's just something I keep thinking about (I do have to think about it to teach on it). Now, my disclaimer: this is going to get a bit, uh, wordy and technical, so if your brain hurts, or if you can't take/handle discussions on human development/evolution just turn back now.
It goes something like this:
At some time circa 100,000 ya (years ago), homo sapiens emerge among other human groups (think homo erectus, neaderthals).
Around 30,000 ya, homo sapiens sapiens emerge as the only human group.
What happened from 100,000 ya-30,000 ya that allowed for the modern human to become the only species of man in the world?
There are a lot of theories, and I won't go into much detail, but the first is this: that homo sapiens were the best at adapting to their surroundings; the other groups were simply weeded out through natural selection. In this process of natural selection, the best character traits have been passed down, and as a single human race, we are the second largest group of mammals on the planet that is genetically similar (after the cheetahs). Over the course of this time, we developed aspects of human culture that is inherent to all people--a universal human nature. We generally see this as a good thing, as in the modern world, in the face of racism, hate crimes, and cultural insensitivity, we like to see just how similar we are to one another. We all laugh in the same language afterall.
but then, here's where the other shoe drops. what if the reason why homo sapiens survived over all the other groups wasn't that we were better at adapting, and had the best characteristics for survival, but that we were the group that was the one that was able and willing to commit egregious acts of violence against the other human groups. that we survived because we killed off everyone else. and if we accept that humans have an underlying universal nature-- aspects inherent to all men and women-- then what does this mean for modern peoples? that underneath all modern conceptions of culture, we have an inherent trait to commit violence on a massive scale.
and it is not difficult to see how this could be true, given the events of the last 100 years of human history. It is so easy to stand and label "good guy/bad guy;" "us/them;" "right/wrong," when we feel a moral superiority. But what does it mean when you figure out that you are the bad guy? that for all our morality, religion, spirituality... we are all bad guys.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
History 101
Ever have one of those moments when you go to lecture only to have your mind just completely blown away? Little did you know that when you entered through the doors of that lecture hall, dazed and confused, that 45 minutes later you would just have your whole world turned upside down. Pretty darn amazing.
I've mentioned this before, but its a new semester and a new history of experience with a new professor (new to me, not fresh PhD). And as part of my job, I get to sit in on weekly lectures--this can prove to be boring and a waste of time. Only with this new professor, I realized this week just how much I miss attending really good lectures. I mean, I haven't sat in a lecture to have my mind blown away in like 3ish years. Now, don't get me wrong, I love my advisor and learn a lot in her classes, but I never really had that mind boggling experience described above while I sat in her lectures.
As an undergrad, I remember having just amazing lectures. People always (give me crap) question why it is that I never changed my major to Classics; why did I choose to stay in the "inferior" Humanities side of the department. I firmly believe now that it was on the strength of the lectures I had as a Hum major that I never desired to be elsewhere. I mean, I was just so engaged, so invested, so transfixed in the world created by my professors during their lectures. Just. So. Enthralled. I'm not sure if I talked about it on this blog, but seriously within a semester's worth of lectures I think I must have cried like 5 times, and nearly cried almost twice that. Everything was alive; everything felt weighty and had a purpose.
I can't believe how long it has been since I've had one of those moments. I miss having that. So I'm really excited to sit in on this history 101 course. It reminds me of what it feels like to have my curiosity peaked, to feel the material come alive, and to experience a sense of history in ways I couldn't even conceptualize before. How lucky:)
I've mentioned this before, but its a new semester and a new history of experience with a new professor (new to me, not fresh PhD). And as part of my job, I get to sit in on weekly lectures--this can prove to be boring and a waste of time. Only with this new professor, I realized this week just how much I miss attending really good lectures. I mean, I haven't sat in a lecture to have my mind blown away in like 3ish years. Now, don't get me wrong, I love my advisor and learn a lot in her classes, but I never really had that mind boggling experience described above while I sat in her lectures.
As an undergrad, I remember having just amazing lectures. People always (give me crap) question why it is that I never changed my major to Classics; why did I choose to stay in the "inferior" Humanities side of the department. I firmly believe now that it was on the strength of the lectures I had as a Hum major that I never desired to be elsewhere. I mean, I was just so engaged, so invested, so transfixed in the world created by my professors during their lectures. Just. So. Enthralled. I'm not sure if I talked about it on this blog, but seriously within a semester's worth of lectures I think I must have cried like 5 times, and nearly cried almost twice that. Everything was alive; everything felt weighty and had a purpose.
I can't believe how long it has been since I've had one of those moments. I miss having that. So I'm really excited to sit in on this history 101 course. It reminds me of what it feels like to have my curiosity peaked, to feel the material come alive, and to experience a sense of history in ways I couldn't even conceptualize before. How lucky:)
Monday, January 25, 2010
Surveys..
you know I love them. And it's been a while since I've done one on here, so when I came across this, I figured why not just post this baby right up. so here we go..
Favorite Ice Cream Flavor:
Ice Cream: depends on where the ice cream is coming from. Rite-aid? chocolate malted crunch please. Ben and Jerrys? Half-baked! Maggie-Moos? Red velvet, definitely.
Sorbet: Mango
Gelato: PANNA-freakin--COTTA. oh Italy, I miss you.
Bar: do ice cream sandwiches count?
Favorite Bubble Tea Flavor:
milk-tea; almond milk-tea; coconut milk-tea.
Favorite Snack:
Healthy: bananas or dried cranberries.
Unhealthy: probably cookies of some kind.
Coke or Pepsi?
although I don't really drink either, I'd have to say Coke.
Cat or Dog?
Dog.
Favorite Superhero:
hm. does sherlock holmes count? if not, then probably batman, or gambit from x-men. OR even better, Mr. DARCY.
Favorite Childhood Movies:
anything Disney--little mermaid, beauty and the best, aladdin in particular.
Favorite Disney Princess:
either belle or jasmine. Belle for her brains, Jasmine for her guts.
Favorite Movies:
To name a few: Amelie, Before Sunset/Sunrise, Bridget Jones' Diary, Whale Rider...
Favorite Slow Song:
I can't pick a particular song. But here are some artists: Boyz II Men, Mariah Carey, Brian Mcknight
Favorite Quote/Song Lyric:
I rarely have favorite **anything** so again, it's hard to say. FiLoLi, while not my favorite quote, is something that I believe in: “Fight for a just cause; Love your fellow man; Live a good life.”
Dream Car:
one that works, is new when I get it, and is paid off =)
Guilty Pleasure:
Shoes, apparently. I didn't realize this until verrry recently. I don't mind spending a lot on shoes, because as I've said before, you really can't underestimate what a good pair of shoes can do for you, and where they can take you.
Pet Peeve:
Lights on in rooms where no one is there. The noises people make when they eat.
If you could travel anywhere, where would you go?
Right now, I've got the travel bug to go to Asia-- korea, japan, china, singapore, thailand, cambodia, malasia...
What did you want to be when you were a kid?
Disney Imagineer. I even made my parents buy me a book from the disney store about it.
What are three things you can't live without?
1) God 2) family 3) friends
What would you say is your best physical trait?
my thick calves.
What's the first thing you see in the opposite sex?
height? not suree..
What is your idea of a romantic day?
hm. spending it with Mr. Darcy? ah, getting away and doing something new and adventurous. Eating good/new food.
What is one thing you want to accomplish before you die?
To know that I've lived well, and have done good.
What's your most embarrassing moment?
too many to mention! but here are a few: my crush on Freddie getting "outed"; giving a speech with my fly down; my whole adolescence...
dunners. no tags. no pokes. do it if you want, or don't.
Favorite Ice Cream Flavor:
Ice Cream: depends on where the ice cream is coming from. Rite-aid? chocolate malted crunch please. Ben and Jerrys? Half-baked! Maggie-Moos? Red velvet, definitely.
Sorbet: Mango
Gelato: PANNA-freakin--COTTA. oh Italy, I miss you.
Bar: do ice cream sandwiches count?
Favorite Bubble Tea Flavor:
milk-tea; almond milk-tea; coconut milk-tea.
Favorite Snack:
Healthy: bananas or dried cranberries.
Unhealthy: probably cookies of some kind.
Coke or Pepsi?
although I don't really drink either, I'd have to say Coke.
Cat or Dog?
Dog.
Favorite Superhero:
hm. does sherlock holmes count? if not, then probably batman, or gambit from x-men. OR even better, Mr. DARCY.
Favorite Childhood Movies:
anything Disney--little mermaid, beauty and the best, aladdin in particular.
Favorite Disney Princess:
either belle or jasmine. Belle for her brains, Jasmine for her guts.
Favorite Movies:
To name a few: Amelie, Before Sunset/Sunrise, Bridget Jones' Diary, Whale Rider...
Favorite Slow Song:
I can't pick a particular song. But here are some artists: Boyz II Men, Mariah Carey, Brian Mcknight
Favorite Quote/Song Lyric:
I rarely have favorite **anything** so again, it's hard to say. FiLoLi, while not my favorite quote, is something that I believe in: “Fight for a just cause; Love your fellow man; Live a good life.”
Dream Car:
one that works, is new when I get it, and is paid off =)
Guilty Pleasure:
Shoes, apparently. I didn't realize this until verrry recently. I don't mind spending a lot on shoes, because as I've said before, you really can't underestimate what a good pair of shoes can do for you, and where they can take you.
Pet Peeve:
Lights on in rooms where no one is there. The noises people make when they eat.
If you could travel anywhere, where would you go?
Right now, I've got the travel bug to go to Asia-- korea, japan, china, singapore, thailand, cambodia, malasia...
What did you want to be when you were a kid?
Disney Imagineer. I even made my parents buy me a book from the disney store about it.
What are three things you can't live without?
1) God 2) family 3) friends
What would you say is your best physical trait?
my thick calves.
What's the first thing you see in the opposite sex?
height? not suree..
What is your idea of a romantic day?
hm. spending it with Mr. Darcy? ah, getting away and doing something new and adventurous. Eating good/new food.
What is one thing you want to accomplish before you die?
To know that I've lived well, and have done good.
What's your most embarrassing moment?
too many to mention! but here are a few: my crush on Freddie getting "outed"; giving a speech with my fly down; my whole adolescence...
dunners. no tags. no pokes. do it if you want, or don't.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
In defense of Stalking
yeah, I'm writing a post about this. quit laughing at me for a second and thinking how fitting it is that, of all people, I would write about this. Just...hear me out.
I suppose I should start by writing a disclaimer. I do not, in any capacity, endorse stalking as it is defined by L. Royakkers, "Stalking is a form of mental assault, in which the perpetrator repeatedly, unwontedly, and disruptively breaks into the life-world of the victim, with whom they have no relationship (or no longer have)." This kind of stalking leads to dangerous, violent, and scary places. It is a clear mental sickness and ought to be treated. To be clear, I am not defending the kind of behaviour that results in restraining orders, or worse, imprisonment. I have a strong sense of personal privacy (see previous post), and believe that some things are not meant to be shared.
But let's keep this on a lighter note people.
What I am talking about is the light-hearted, good-humoured, stalking. The kind that infatuated boys and girls succumb to when "crushing" on (professors) other boys and girls--sometimes mainstream celebrities, other times, internet celebrities.
In such cases where the stalker does not know the stalkee, e.g. celebrities, it is often a matter of the stalker projecting their own hopes, desires, and wishes on the stalkee. We don't know who these people really are, and for most of us, that's fine. We want the illusion, not the reality. Like so many other things in life, the dream--the ideal--far surpasses the reality. But we also want to feel connected to that dream, so we google search, facebook, and pick up on key words to find out as much as we can. And whatever new information we find, we process in our minds and spin it into somehow fulfilling yet another quality which just makes our stalkee just that much more perfect. **swoon and sigh**
Anyone who knows me knows that I crush pretty frequently, and hard. I have the potential to **love** just about everybody. That, in turn, means that I will stalk just about anybody. dun dun dun! Now, some people say that sometimes my stalking is a bit much, or that, in general, this sort of innocent stalking is creepy, scary and perverse. But let me just say that this harmless stalking behaviour is no worse than the kinds of illusions little girls have when dreaming of their prince charming.
girls, at a very young age, are conditioned by fairy tales, disney, nursery rhymes, etc., into believing in some sort of happily ever after--complete with Mr. Prince Charming. But as girls get older, they realize that the world they live in, doesn't have dragons that need to be slayed, castle towers that they need rescuing from, wicked step-mothers that want to do them in, nor forest creatures as their best friends. Their reality has changed. But they still want that comfort of finding their prince that will wake them up from a spell with a kiss. So what to do? change their prince charming as well. He no longer is a prince, riding ever so handsomely on his gallant horse and brandishing his sword to come to your defense. He is, a scruffy looking englishman who plays a sparkly vampire in that one movie series. He is one-fifth of a late 1990s boy band.
The dream is too much to give up, and we will cling on to that "happily ever after" fiercely. You can blame social conditioning for that. But is it so very bad? For the most part, it is all just harmless and innocent. It's nice to have something to hope for, even if it does leave you disappointed. Again, we desire the illusion because no one really wants to have that dream crushed by actually meeting their stalkee and realizing that they weren't as great as they thought. We just need an outlet to dump semi-romantic feelings upon.
so what am I saying? Don't hate the player, hate the game!
Btw, who am I currently stalking? well... that's for me to know, and you to find out by stalking me. just kidding. really. please dont stalk me ;)
I suppose I should start by writing a disclaimer. I do not, in any capacity, endorse stalking as it is defined by L. Royakkers, "Stalking is a form of mental assault, in which the perpetrator repeatedly, unwontedly, and disruptively breaks into the life-world of the victim, with whom they have no relationship (or no longer have)." This kind of stalking leads to dangerous, violent, and scary places. It is a clear mental sickness and ought to be treated. To be clear, I am not defending the kind of behaviour that results in restraining orders, or worse, imprisonment. I have a strong sense of personal privacy (see previous post), and believe that some things are not meant to be shared.
But let's keep this on a lighter note people.
What I am talking about is the light-hearted, good-humoured, stalking. The kind that infatuated boys and girls succumb to when "crushing" on (professors) other boys and girls--sometimes mainstream celebrities, other times, internet celebrities.
In such cases where the stalker does not know the stalkee, e.g. celebrities, it is often a matter of the stalker projecting their own hopes, desires, and wishes on the stalkee. We don't know who these people really are, and for most of us, that's fine. We want the illusion, not the reality. Like so many other things in life, the dream--the ideal--far surpasses the reality. But we also want to feel connected to that dream, so we google search, facebook, and pick up on key words to find out as much as we can. And whatever new information we find, we process in our minds and spin it into somehow fulfilling yet another quality which just makes our stalkee just that much more perfect. **swoon and sigh**
Anyone who knows me knows that I crush pretty frequently, and hard. I have the potential to **love** just about everybody. That, in turn, means that I will stalk just about anybody. dun dun dun! Now, some people say that sometimes my stalking is a bit much, or that, in general, this sort of innocent stalking is creepy, scary and perverse. But let me just say that this harmless stalking behaviour is no worse than the kinds of illusions little girls have when dreaming of their prince charming.
girls, at a very young age, are conditioned by fairy tales, disney, nursery rhymes, etc., into believing in some sort of happily ever after--complete with Mr. Prince Charming. But as girls get older, they realize that the world they live in, doesn't have dragons that need to be slayed, castle towers that they need rescuing from, wicked step-mothers that want to do them in, nor forest creatures as their best friends. Their reality has changed. But they still want that comfort of finding their prince that will wake them up from a spell with a kiss. So what to do? change their prince charming as well. He no longer is a prince, riding ever so handsomely on his gallant horse and brandishing his sword to come to your defense. He is, a scruffy looking englishman who plays a sparkly vampire in that one movie series. He is one-fifth of a late 1990s boy band.
The dream is too much to give up, and we will cling on to that "happily ever after" fiercely. You can blame social conditioning for that. But is it so very bad? For the most part, it is all just harmless and innocent. It's nice to have something to hope for, even if it does leave you disappointed. Again, we desire the illusion because no one really wants to have that dream crushed by actually meeting their stalkee and realizing that they weren't as great as they thought. We just need an outlet to dump semi-romantic feelings upon.
so what am I saying? Don't hate the player, hate the game!
Btw, who am I currently stalking? well... that's for me to know, and you to find out by stalking me. just kidding. really. please dont stalk me ;)
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Oh the weather outside is frightful
We are having craaazy rainstorms in socal...and even a tornado advisory? unheard of! I was in the car listening to the radio when I first heard about the tornado warning and immediately thought, "this isn't local radio because we don't get tornadoes in san diego." Little did I know...right?
Anyway, I'm in my room getting some work done, and it's just ridiculous outside! I opened my blinds to take a look outside and instantaneously felt the effects of such an action. My room lost substantial heat, and now I'm huddled under a blanket as I sit at my desk. I haven't seen rain like this in san diego in a while, but its good for us. Not to mention that I loooove this weather, but I hate being in it. That is, driving around in it. If I am at home, or tucked away in a cafe or something, then its allll good =)
Oh! Big news... I finished writing out my thesis today!! yippie!! No, I'm not done by any means, but the longest, hardest, most strenuous part of the process is now OVER. It was amazing because when I turned in my conclusion (a sad, sad 6.5 pages that I am not proud of in any sense), it didn't even hit me that I finished the first full draft until like, 30 mins later haha. Talk about living in the moment, right?
Also, school started today and I am TAing again. History 101. Yesterday all of us who TAed last semester got our student evals back. Now, there really wasn't anything that my student could have said that I didn't already know (in terms of criticism), and I think that I am waay more hard on myself than they know. That being said, I think they were pretty fair, and actually a lot less scathing than I thought they would be. So thanks to my History 100 students=) As for this semester, I'm trying to go at it in a better, more positive way. I think I learned a lot from last semester, so hopefully I can apply it in meaningful ways.
I have a couple top secret projects coming up. More of this later, but suffice it to say that I am looking forward to the upcoming weeks!
Perfect for a stormy day. Love songs, hot tea, shortbread cookies from "London" and Darcy...okay stop being emo ;)
on repeat: Karina's Slow Motion; Falling Slowly
Anyway, I'm in my room getting some work done, and it's just ridiculous outside! I opened my blinds to take a look outside and instantaneously felt the effects of such an action. My room lost substantial heat, and now I'm huddled under a blanket as I sit at my desk. I haven't seen rain like this in san diego in a while, but its good for us. Not to mention that I loooove this weather, but I hate being in it. That is, driving around in it. If I am at home, or tucked away in a cafe or something, then its allll good =)
Oh! Big news... I finished writing out my thesis today!! yippie!! No, I'm not done by any means, but the longest, hardest, most strenuous part of the process is now OVER. It was amazing because when I turned in my conclusion (a sad, sad 6.5 pages that I am not proud of in any sense), it didn't even hit me that I finished the first full draft until like, 30 mins later haha. Talk about living in the moment, right?
Also, school started today and I am TAing again. History 101. Yesterday all of us who TAed last semester got our student evals back. Now, there really wasn't anything that my student could have said that I didn't already know (in terms of criticism), and I think that I am waay more hard on myself than they know. That being said, I think they were pretty fair, and actually a lot less scathing than I thought they would be. So thanks to my History 100 students=) As for this semester, I'm trying to go at it in a better, more positive way. I think I learned a lot from last semester, so hopefully I can apply it in meaningful ways.
I have a couple top secret projects coming up. More of this later, but suffice it to say that I am looking forward to the upcoming weeks!
Perfect for a stormy day. Love songs, hot tea, shortbread cookies from "London" and Darcy...okay stop being emo ;)
on repeat: Karina's Slow Motion; Falling Slowly
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Let's talk about AWKWARD.
I realize that I'm a slightly awkward person. I also acknowledge my general distaste for personal contact/ eye contact with people, and that I have, perhaps, a strong sense of privacy. I am even guarded in the expression of personal/private matters. Some people call it reservation, others call it shyness, prudishness, weirdness, and even, false modesty based on egoism. I can't explain it, I won't make excuses for it, and I definitely don't see anything wrong with it--Let's just make that clear. If anything, the world needs a little more restraint. But I digress..
The reason why I'm bringing this up, is that this past weekend, I was surrounded by awkwardness. I attended an academic conference (shout out to the APA/AIA LOL), that while on paper seems to be very professional, it is also a festering mass of potentially awkward situations. I mean, think about it, professors from all around the country/world fly in for a 4-day free for all; yeah sure, in the day time they give/listen to presentations on their most recent research, but when the sun goes down (and often even before that!), debauchery is at hand. Inebriated academics, BOTH students and professors, linger around the hotel bars (oh yeah, this all takes place in hotel lobbies, ballrooms, and OTHER hotel rooms), talking shop and schmoozing. If you want to get anywhere as an up-and-coming somebody, you better down some liquid courage and rub elbows with the big boys (and girls).
Potentially awkward encounters + awkward me = SUPER excellent awkwardness to witness!!
And that's what it was my friends. First of all, let's start off my talking about the HANDSHAKE. From what I know, you are supposed to present yourself with a firm handshake... I guess it is supposed to exude confidence or something. But really, it becomes more of a test. A test of wills, so see who can break off someone's hand. Because really, who hasn't come across someone whose handshake literally made your hand numb afterwards? Like, calm down there Hulk. As a girl, I always get that I should have a firm handshake. As a person who doesn't like to be touched, the fact that I'm even making hand-to-hand contact with you should be enough, buddy, forget about it being a "firm" one. Oh! back to that other point, how do you even figure out what a "firm" handshake is? Applying the correct about of pressure has got to be one of the trickiest things. You don't want to be the aforementioned that guy.
Immediately after the handshake, or rather, accompanying the handshake, is the introduction. In my everyday life, I only, really, have one name: Michelle. And I introduce myself as such, "Hello, I'm Michelle." Easy. Straight-forward. Unpretensious. And I usually introduce myself with a **wave** rather than a handshake...even better!! In a professional setting, not only do I have to go with my full name, but I have to have some sort of qualifier that comes afterwards. But this always makes me uncomfortable and is awkward namely because I have nothing really to say for myself! In these professional settings, people use their full names to distinguish their professional work from all the rest of the "Johns" and the qualifier to separate themselves from all the other "John Smiths" of the world. I have neither work or reputation to distinguish me from anyone else. So it kinda comes across like this: "Hello, Michelle P******. San Diego State. Student of Beth *******." And that's it. I have nothing to my name, so I have to name drop!! It really is sad and quite pathetic. However, we both know that this person will forget our encounter, and my name. And we operate under that knowledge, refusing to be impolite about it.
Mind you, these introductions are all happening in that cluster fcuk of academic socializing, but it's just like being 13 and at a middle school dance. The point is the converse charmingly, win over your audience of brilliant professors who will, in turn, support all your academic endevours. I reality, is, that I make pathetic small talk, and sip on soda water, if I'm not already a wallflower watching all the popular boys and girls dance. Things really haven't changed too much from 13 to 24!
The reason why I'm bringing this up, is that this past weekend, I was surrounded by awkwardness. I attended an academic conference (shout out to the APA/AIA LOL), that while on paper seems to be very professional, it is also a festering mass of potentially awkward situations. I mean, think about it, professors from all around the country/world fly in for a 4-day free for all; yeah sure, in the day time they give/listen to presentations on their most recent research, but when the sun goes down (and often even before that!), debauchery is at hand. Inebriated academics, BOTH students and professors, linger around the hotel bars (oh yeah, this all takes place in hotel lobbies, ballrooms, and OTHER hotel rooms), talking shop and schmoozing. If you want to get anywhere as an up-and-coming somebody, you better down some liquid courage and rub elbows with the big boys (and girls).
Potentially awkward encounters + awkward me = SUPER excellent awkwardness to witness!!
And that's what it was my friends. First of all, let's start off my talking about the HANDSHAKE. From what I know, you are supposed to present yourself with a firm handshake... I guess it is supposed to exude confidence or something. But really, it becomes more of a test. A test of wills, so see who can break off someone's hand. Because really, who hasn't come across someone whose handshake literally made your hand numb afterwards? Like, calm down there Hulk. As a girl, I always get that I should have a firm handshake. As a person who doesn't like to be touched, the fact that I'm even making hand-to-hand contact with you should be enough, buddy, forget about it being a "firm" one. Oh! back to that other point, how do you even figure out what a "firm" handshake is? Applying the correct about of pressure has got to be one of the trickiest things. You don't want to be the aforementioned that guy.
Immediately after the handshake, or rather, accompanying the handshake, is the introduction. In my everyday life, I only, really, have one name: Michelle. And I introduce myself as such, "Hello, I'm Michelle." Easy. Straight-forward. Unpretensious. And I usually introduce myself with a **wave** rather than a handshake...even better!! In a professional setting, not only do I have to go with my full name, but I have to have some sort of qualifier that comes afterwards. But this always makes me uncomfortable and is awkward namely because I have nothing really to say for myself! In these professional settings, people use their full names to distinguish their professional work from all the rest of the "Johns" and the qualifier to separate themselves from all the other "John Smiths" of the world. I have neither work or reputation to distinguish me from anyone else. So it kinda comes across like this: "Hello, Michelle P******. San Diego State. Student of Beth *******." And that's it. I have nothing to my name, so I have to name drop!! It really is sad and quite pathetic. However, we both know that this person will forget our encounter, and my name. And we operate under that knowledge, refusing to be impolite about it.
Mind you, these introductions are all happening in that cluster fcuk of academic socializing, but it's just like being 13 and at a middle school dance. The point is the converse charmingly, win over your audience of brilliant professors who will, in turn, support all your academic endevours. I reality, is, that I make pathetic small talk, and sip on soda water, if I'm not already a wallflower watching all the popular boys and girls dance. Things really haven't changed too much from 13 to 24!
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
to a new year.
And so I made a major decision. I had to make sure that next
year, I wouldn't end up shit-faced and listening to sad FM,
easy-listening for the over-thirties. I decided to take
control of my life, and start a diary... to tell the truth
about Bridget Jones...the whole truth. Resolution number one:
obviously will lose twenty pounds. Number two: always put last
night's panties in the laundrybasket. Equally important... will
find nice sensible boyfriend to go outwith...and not continue to
form romantic attachments to any of the following: alcoholics,
workaholics, commitment-phobics... peeping toms, megalomaniacs,
emotional fuckwits, or perverts. And especially will not
fantasize...about a particular person who embodies all these
things.
love bridget. and just like her, I think a new year brings about new resolutions that may or may not, but probably most definitely, be broken. My resolutions? probably the same as last year and the year before that and the year before that. In the words of ms. jones, "obviously will lose twenty pounds." Or, better yet, just be more healthy. making better choices about what I eat and how I spend my time. Walking more places. Drinking more water. I wanted to start this right when I got back from my trip, but I'm actually really sick--not to mention jet lagged-- so I figure I should get healthy so I can actually get healthier. Number two: will be more productive in my happiness. That means spending less time wandering around the internet and watching youtube videos, and spending more time doing things that make me happy. Reading more, taking art classes, spending more time with friends and the people who make me happy. And, in the interest of trying NOT to break these resolutions, I think I'll end the list at number two. My resolutions don't sound to bad, eh? Be healthy and happy in 2010. There's some feel-goodness right there.
Here's to a happy 2010 =)
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