winter olympics

Nothing--and I mean nothing--on TV has me on the edge of my seat quite like figure skating.

All growing up I used to be glued to the TV whenever the olympics came on. In the summer, it was all about gymnastics; in the winter, figure skating. I love the olympics because I choose to believe that it celebrates something intrinsically human that is, for a matter of weeks, reaffirmed through the games. I believe in its intent, its potential and its spirit. And, come on, its greek in origin and tradition, so I'm pre-programmed to like it. gosh, I love the games.

But for some reason, I haven't seen nearly anything about this year's winter games. I don't know when it started, I've missed all sort of figure skating programs, and to be honest, I don't even have a team/person to support beyond the nameless American. Is it only me who is feeling like this? Because I feel like its only me. But I think I've narrowed it down to a couple of reasons why I'm not engaging in the games this year.

One: I'm so shoulder-deep into my thesis that I'm out of touch with current events. Honestly, I have no idea what is going on in the world. This makes me sad.

Two: Stressing a point I made above. I've just got no one, in particular, to cheer for. In general, of course, Team USA...but not having an athlete(s) to rally behind, is exactly like watching the superbowl but having your team eliminated ages ago. You just can't get behind it. I also think that when you have a face in mind when you cheer for your team, you manifest all those good emotions and friendly competition in that one person. You invest in their story and make it your story so every victory is particularly sweet, and every obstacle and failure particularly crushing.

Three: Ever since Michelle Kwan stopped skating, I stopped caring/watching. She was the main reason I watched the winter olympics. I wanted to see her skate. I was so invested in her success. I remember in 98 cutting out newspaper articles about her, at first as the one favored to win gold, and then, as the one who somehow--despite skating 2 solid programs--managed to medal at the olympics, but the medal was the wrong color. In 2002, I remember thinking that this was the year she would get it all back. That despite her being older than her competitors, that it didn't matter because she would for sure win Gold. And then just being crushed when Michelle ended up with bronze. I remember hoping against hope in 2006 that she would qualify for the national team despite her injuries, and that she would be well enough to finally get that Gold medal, as it was probably the last olympics she would participate in and still have a chance. Then came the disappointment when she announced that she was withdrawing from the competition, and thinking that it was all over.

See what I mean? For me, Michelle Kwan embodied all the things I love about watching the olympics. Her journey was my journey. And when she left, there wasn't much else for me to hold on to. Her face was replaced with unfamiliar one; her techniques, grace, and heart were replaced with a frigidness that matched the new scoring system. As much as her olympic journey had ended, so did mine, despite me not being an athlete, nevermind an olympic one haha.


I miss her!